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Thursday, November 02, 2006

It's Office Candy Day!!

It's two days past Halloween. In homes across America, all of the candy has been sorted and put into gigantic piles while parents everywhere wonder to themselves, 'Holy Crap! What are we going to do with all this candy?! That is just way too much! We need to get some of this out of the house before I O.D. on Kit-Kats.'

The solution to this problem is simple: Bring it into work and leave it in a pile in the break room. Hungry nerds will descend upon the candy pile like sharks smelling blood.

The problem: siphoning the candy out of the house without the children noticing that the candy bag has suddenly become noticeably smaller. It is difficult, but it can be done, as long as you are careful and don't take too much candy out at once.

This morning I arrived at work with my bag of leftover candy and headed to the break room to drop it off. There was already a large candy bowl in the middle of a table, filled almost to the top with candy. Notice I said 'almost'. Undoubtedly the bowl was full when it arrived, but even before 10 AM, the nerds had discovered that there is FREE CANDY in the break-room. I dumped my pile on top, filling the bowl back up.

I am willing to bet that the candy bowl will be empty by the time I leave work this afternoon. Nothing attracts nerds like free food and if it happens to be free candy, well, that's simply irresistible to the cube-dwelling folk in offices everywhere.

The vending machine guy is going to be pissed. It is going to be 'no dinero' for the vending machine company, for the next few days at least, as people whittle the candy levels in their homes down to  more reasonable levels.

I'll be checking the break-room candy bowl every few hours to see how things are progressing. Of course, there are bound to be people like me coming in and filling the bowl back up with more candy, so it will be interesting to see what will happen. 

Will the bowl remain at a consistent, nearly full level, or will the candy eventually run out? How long will it take? Will it be empty by lunch? Or will it take all day?

As you can see, this will provide me with an interesting distraction to the mundane work day that looms ahead...

Check back for an update later on!

I just checked the candy bowl before heading into the superfun, always cold, dark and noisy computer lab. It's not even 11 AM yet and all of the candy that I had piled into the bowl this morning is GONE. The bowl is currently sitting at half full. Many of the nerds don't arrive at work till 10ish (it's a laid back place), so it's possible the bowl could be re-filled at some point. More to come...

Update 2:
It's noon-ish and the candy bowl is about 1/4 full. All of the chocolate stuff is just about gone. All that's left is a few straggling 3 Musketeers bars (who really likes those anyway?) and hard candy like smarties and lollypops.

Ok admission time: I grabbed a few candies myself. I noticed there were some Reeses' 'Fast Break' and 'Nutrageous' bars in there and I nabbed them. Hey, I had never tried those before and I wanted to see what they tasted like, ok? The 'Fast Break' tastes like snickers, except with peanut butter instead of nuts. I like Snickers better. The 'Nutrageous' was super good though. And I grabbed a cherry Tootsie-Pop. And that's IT, so step the fuck off.

Update 3:
For those of you still following along, it's around 4PM and all that's left in the office break-room candy bowl are a few straggling lollypops. Those will be gone soon I bet.

Well that was fun. I'm going to have to come up with more goofy things to keep track of at the office. It's like a secret side project. It makes the day go by quicker.


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Since my office consists of four people, my boss is a grandfather, co-editor has teenagers, typist is 18 years-old and moi, we don't have candy day. :(

Sorry. You are probably better off anyway. Less candy around means less candy to eat!

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